"You Can't Sit With Us"
I have two groups of girlfriends. The first type of group are women who refuse to have children. They like them from a distance, but are not looking to have their own. These women are both single or married and perfectly fine for me because at one time I felt the same way. The other group are women are the ones who do have kids.
When I got pregnant and had my son, I was sure I would lose touch with all my girlfriends who didn't have any kids. And at the beginning I barely saw or heard from them so I believed my theory was right, but soon after, they came back into my life when all the craziness of taking care of a newborn diminished (because let's face it, that craziness never really ever goes away). My other group of friends, the moms, well...they disappeared. At first it was endless advice and questions and sharing stories of being pregnant and the laughable and cryable moments that follow. But then...Gone Girl status. No more questions or barely any communication at all. Blame it on hectic schedules or phone tag. Busy lives or the very people who are suppose to bring you closer together-the kids.
So when I see these mommy groups or hear about women with kids having playdates, I wonder how is that even possible? I'm lucky if another mother has time to talk to me. Between working full time, husbands, boyfriends, families, other children, errands, appointments, weather, the list goes on and on. It seems like such a cool idea to have my son have a playdate with some of the boys in his daycare class but who has time to stop and exchange names when everyone is running in and out to get to work on time or get home to make dinner? Oh and those Facebook groups for "Mommy and Me" I have a VERY hard time trusting for obvious reasons therefore I refuse to join them.
So my question is...how the hell do you get into a Mommy group?! Do I wear a sign on my back at the daycare? Do I join a strange group online and then meet at a park with the strangers that belong to this group? I thought I would get my mommy card when I left the hospital and would automatically belong to this new group of young, hip mothers. I have more conversations about my kid with my girlfriends who don't have kids than the ones that do. So right now when it comes to fitting in with the mommy groups, I feel like Regina George in Mean Girls being told by Gretchen that '"You can't sit with us!"'.
When I got pregnant and had my son, I was sure I would lose touch with all my girlfriends who didn't have any kids. And at the beginning I barely saw or heard from them so I believed my theory was right, but soon after, they came back into my life when all the craziness of taking care of a newborn diminished (because let's face it, that craziness never really ever goes away). My other group of friends, the moms, well...they disappeared. At first it was endless advice and questions and sharing stories of being pregnant and the laughable and cryable moments that follow. But then...Gone Girl status. No more questions or barely any communication at all. Blame it on hectic schedules or phone tag. Busy lives or the very people who are suppose to bring you closer together-the kids.
So when I see these mommy groups or hear about women with kids having playdates, I wonder how is that even possible? I'm lucky if another mother has time to talk to me. Between working full time, husbands, boyfriends, families, other children, errands, appointments, weather, the list goes on and on. It seems like such a cool idea to have my son have a playdate with some of the boys in his daycare class but who has time to stop and exchange names when everyone is running in and out to get to work on time or get home to make dinner? Oh and those Facebook groups for "Mommy and Me" I have a VERY hard time trusting for obvious reasons therefore I refuse to join them.
So my question is...how the hell do you get into a Mommy group?! Do I wear a sign on my back at the daycare? Do I join a strange group online and then meet at a park with the strangers that belong to this group? I thought I would get my mommy card when I left the hospital and would automatically belong to this new group of young, hip mothers. I have more conversations about my kid with my girlfriends who don't have kids than the ones that do. So right now when it comes to fitting in with the mommy groups, I feel like Regina George in Mean Girls being told by Gretchen that '"You can't sit with us!"'.
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