Move On!
Something has been on my mind for a while and I figured I'd get it off my chest. Even if this doesn't seem like my place, I feel as though it needs to be heard by a lot of women (and men too for that matter).
I never thought I would be getting married and starting a family. Before I met my fiance, I never thought I was deserving of that kind of happiness because every man I was with before made me think that. I'm not saying that everything is perfect every minute of everyday in my relationship, but I am in love with him every second of everyday. It took kissing a lot of frogs to get to finding my Prince but going through everything I have been through with men, this has been well worth the wait.
During my last failed attempt of a relationship, I realized something; I wanted better and I did deserve better. I deserved to be treated the way I needed and felt all women should be treated by a man. I had been nothing but supportive and understanding in many relationships. I have done all the stupid things I wish women didn't do. I turned a blind eye to many things. I ignored warning signs. I stayed when I should have left. And I forced relationships to exist when we were better as friends. I was taken advantage of and didn't listen to others who had my best interest at heart. In a simpler explanation; I was dumb. I was being just plain dumb and I was sick to death of being dumb.
I'm not saying that what my fiance and I have now is picture perfect, it's not. No relationship is. But what we have is completely different than anything I have ever known. It's a relationship where we both are honest with each other, supportive of each other, understanding of each other and respectful of the other person. Although these are verbs that aren't always shown, deep down, we know them to be true. I believe you cannot have a relationship without those things. He has never once disrespected me. And even through my pregnancy (a period where I was taken over by hormones for about a year) he never once lost all his patience with me (which most women know is pretty spectacular). Since the beginning he has always told me I was beautiful and he never stops reminding me how lucky he is.
I'm not trying to boast. What I am trying to say is that I am sick of giving advice to girlfriends who do not listen when it comes to men. And this goes for men too. Women should give you the same in return, except for a few days a month when Aunt Flo comes to town (sorry guys but hormones really are a bitch). Had I not listened to advice from other women who were in the same positions as I was, then I never would have learned to move on and move up when it came to dating men. Not all men are evil or deliberately or intentionally hurting women, but some men are just not the best match for some women. And when you aren't happy and ask for advice ladies, sometimes it's best to listen because you never know what you could find for yourself if you do!
If a guy does not respect you, or give you what you need, then it's time to move on. Just move on! Don't wait for him to change or think he will come to the realization that you are worth being with because the truth is, if he doesn't feel that way the moment he meets you, he never will. It should be instantaneous and most women spend months thinking that eventually he will come around. You are just being taken advantage of. If he's sleeping with you on and off for months but not calling you his girlfriend, taking you out of dates, having you meet his friends, being public and most importantly, making you feel SPECIAL, then move on! Because in a relationship, BOTH parties need to feel as though they are just as important.
So if he's seeing you but only when he's drinking or sleeping with you and still talking to other girls, chances are you are nothing to him but a "friend with benefits". And for some women that's all they want, but if you want more, then wake the hell up and just save your dignity and look elsewhere. I think a lot of women I've met are just lonely and go after whoever is literally right in front of them and try to make something out of it. Call me old fashioned but I think it's desperate for the woman to court the man, have the man court you! That's the way it should be! We deserve it! :) But seriously, if you've been wondering "where is this going?" or asking your friends "what do you think" and they tell you what you were already thinking to yourself, that he's not treating you well, you deserve better, move on, then listen to them because they are right and probably sick to death of hearing you talk about it over and over again.
I never thought I would be getting married and starting a family. Before I met my fiance, I never thought I was deserving of that kind of happiness because every man I was with before made me think that. I'm not saying that everything is perfect every minute of everyday in my relationship, but I am in love with him every second of everyday. It took kissing a lot of frogs to get to finding my Prince but going through everything I have been through with men, this has been well worth the wait.
During my last failed attempt of a relationship, I realized something; I wanted better and I did deserve better. I deserved to be treated the way I needed and felt all women should be treated by a man. I had been nothing but supportive and understanding in many relationships. I have done all the stupid things I wish women didn't do. I turned a blind eye to many things. I ignored warning signs. I stayed when I should have left. And I forced relationships to exist when we were better as friends. I was taken advantage of and didn't listen to others who had my best interest at heart. In a simpler explanation; I was dumb. I was being just plain dumb and I was sick to death of being dumb.
I'm not saying that what my fiance and I have now is picture perfect, it's not. No relationship is. But what we have is completely different than anything I have ever known. It's a relationship where we both are honest with each other, supportive of each other, understanding of each other and respectful of the other person. Although these are verbs that aren't always shown, deep down, we know them to be true. I believe you cannot have a relationship without those things. He has never once disrespected me. And even through my pregnancy (a period where I was taken over by hormones for about a year) he never once lost all his patience with me (which most women know is pretty spectacular). Since the beginning he has always told me I was beautiful and he never stops reminding me how lucky he is.
I'm not trying to boast. What I am trying to say is that I am sick of giving advice to girlfriends who do not listen when it comes to men. And this goes for men too. Women should give you the same in return, except for a few days a month when Aunt Flo comes to town (sorry guys but hormones really are a bitch). Had I not listened to advice from other women who were in the same positions as I was, then I never would have learned to move on and move up when it came to dating men. Not all men are evil or deliberately or intentionally hurting women, but some men are just not the best match for some women. And when you aren't happy and ask for advice ladies, sometimes it's best to listen because you never know what you could find for yourself if you do!
If a guy does not respect you, or give you what you need, then it's time to move on. Just move on! Don't wait for him to change or think he will come to the realization that you are worth being with because the truth is, if he doesn't feel that way the moment he meets you, he never will. It should be instantaneous and most women spend months thinking that eventually he will come around. You are just being taken advantage of. If he's sleeping with you on and off for months but not calling you his girlfriend, taking you out of dates, having you meet his friends, being public and most importantly, making you feel SPECIAL, then move on! Because in a relationship, BOTH parties need to feel as though they are just as important.
So if he's seeing you but only when he's drinking or sleeping with you and still talking to other girls, chances are you are nothing to him but a "friend with benefits". And for some women that's all they want, but if you want more, then wake the hell up and just save your dignity and look elsewhere. I think a lot of women I've met are just lonely and go after whoever is literally right in front of them and try to make something out of it. Call me old fashioned but I think it's desperate for the woman to court the man, have the man court you! That's the way it should be! We deserve it! :) But seriously, if you've been wondering "where is this going?" or asking your friends "what do you think" and they tell you what you were already thinking to yourself, that he's not treating you well, you deserve better, move on, then listen to them because they are right and probably sick to death of hearing you talk about it over and over again.
Once you realize your own worth the right person will come along.
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