Don't Leave It All To Mom
Sure, it looks like I have it all together. Whenever our family goes anywhere or does anything, we are more than prepared. Why? Because I organize it all. Everything from the tiniest details of the "what-if " category to the obvious diaper changes. I honestly do not know how I don't have a panic attack, fall down from exhaustion or just have my brain shut down from everything that I have to remember and do on a daily basis.
I've always been organized and planned a head for nearly everything. I just never expected that when I would become a wife and mother that my brain would have to work so much harder to just keep everything together. Bills, utilities, grocery shopping, cleaning, cooking, teaching, playing...the list goes on and on and for most of that time I was working on top of it all. How I remembered to brush my teeth in the morning is beyond me. Actually, I'm not even sure I did.
If you visit my house, there will be dust on the TV stand if I don't get to it. There will be crumbs on the counter if I don't clean them, there will be a bathroom just overloaded with soap-scum and a overflowing garbage if I don't take the time to go in there and clean it. If we go out, you will see my diaper bag packed with everything you can think of and yes, we will be needing it all, and it wouldn't be in there had I not remembered to pack it. Our lights would go off if I hadn't remembered to pay the electric bill. Our son would wear the same clothes over and over if I did not put his clean stuff in his drawers. Basically, shit would hit the fan.
I know I am not the only mother/wife who remembers it all and does it all. And I'm not saying that I don't have a husband who helps when I ask him to. There are a lot of women who do just as much or even more for their families every single day and do not have anyone to ask for help with it all. But for those who do, those who have husbands or significant others, don't leave it all up to one person. It's exhausting. I know plenty of stay at home mothers with one to four small kids who feel guilty for not bringing in an income and therefore feel the need to be this Superwoman who can do everything and have her husband want for nothing because they feel it is their "job". It's these women I feel sorry for. It is hard being a mother. It is hard keeping your house clean and your child clean at the same time. It is hard to have to remember things and do things for everyone.
My point here is that although being a wife and mother can be very rewarding, don't make it unbearable for her by leaving it all for mom to do. Your kid is hungry? Feed him. The house is dirty? Clean it. You don't know where anything is? Find it.Your kid's acting up? Discipline them. You're going somewhere? Pack. Don't rely on the mother to make all of this things her sole priority in life. She will be tired and resent you for it later. It takes two to make a marriage work and it takes an army to raise a child...so think about all you do and all the mother of your child does for both you and your baby and then ask..."how can I help?" You will be surprised the difference it will all make.
I've always been organized and planned a head for nearly everything. I just never expected that when I would become a wife and mother that my brain would have to work so much harder to just keep everything together. Bills, utilities, grocery shopping, cleaning, cooking, teaching, playing...the list goes on and on and for most of that time I was working on top of it all. How I remembered to brush my teeth in the morning is beyond me. Actually, I'm not even sure I did.
If you visit my house, there will be dust on the TV stand if I don't get to it. There will be crumbs on the counter if I don't clean them, there will be a bathroom just overloaded with soap-scum and a overflowing garbage if I don't take the time to go in there and clean it. If we go out, you will see my diaper bag packed with everything you can think of and yes, we will be needing it all, and it wouldn't be in there had I not remembered to pack it. Our lights would go off if I hadn't remembered to pay the electric bill. Our son would wear the same clothes over and over if I did not put his clean stuff in his drawers. Basically, shit would hit the fan.
I know I am not the only mother/wife who remembers it all and does it all. And I'm not saying that I don't have a husband who helps when I ask him to. There are a lot of women who do just as much or even more for their families every single day and do not have anyone to ask for help with it all. But for those who do, those who have husbands or significant others, don't leave it all up to one person. It's exhausting. I know plenty of stay at home mothers with one to four small kids who feel guilty for not bringing in an income and therefore feel the need to be this Superwoman who can do everything and have her husband want for nothing because they feel it is their "job". It's these women I feel sorry for. It is hard being a mother. It is hard keeping your house clean and your child clean at the same time. It is hard to have to remember things and do things for everyone.
My point here is that although being a wife and mother can be very rewarding, don't make it unbearable for her by leaving it all for mom to do. Your kid is hungry? Feed him. The house is dirty? Clean it. You don't know where anything is? Find it.Your kid's acting up? Discipline them. You're going somewhere? Pack. Don't rely on the mother to make all of this things her sole priority in life. She will be tired and resent you for it later. It takes two to make a marriage work and it takes an army to raise a child...so think about all you do and all the mother of your child does for both you and your baby and then ask..."how can I help?" You will be surprised the difference it will all make.
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